Does Rubbing and Petting on Horses do any good?

We all show affection and happiness in different ways,...touching, rubbing and hugging are common. When it comes to horses, it is way more common to see women doing these things to their horses then men. If you haven't seen a Craig Cameron clinic, you ought to, even if just to see him demonstrate when he says' "reach down there and pet your horse's neck", and show how men just pat the horse on the neck once, feeling uncomfortable with more affection than that. Everyone laughs because they know  it's true.

I don't know if women are more likely to anthropomorphize with horses - that is believing their horses have human characteristics and feelings, and therefore understand the intent of affection. You only have to hang around a large barn for a day to her such things as: "that little bay mare over really hates men"; "my horse loves me, he smiles when he sees me coming"; "my horse loves it when I drape my arms around his neck and hug him". I'm not here to say that beliefs such as those are untrue. I just don't know. But what I do know is that to anthropomorphize negative human behavior with horses is almost always wrong. And it's funny, not funny to see somebody, usually a man, think that petting and rubbing on a horse is a waste of time, but believes that when a horse does something he doesn't like, it's an intentional act of defiance just for defiance's sake.

 I have never had a problem with anyone seeing me   rub on my horses thinking that I'm a softy or   whatever they think. I know that me rubbing my   mustache on my horse's muzzle, or burying my face   in his neck, is much more for me than for the benefit   of the horse.

 Then I get this Palomino Gelding who I call Jake. A   nervous little horse who had never really been   taught much. He had to go every place at a trot   always looking around. Not really spooky, but   always alert. I just thought 'well, he's never had a   leader and we can fix that over time'. He didn't like a   lot of rubbing either. He would switch his tail and   pin his ears. So like the saying goes, he didn't need   less of it, he needed more but at a pace he could   accept. And that's what I did, rub and touched him   every chance I had.

Jake made much improvement on his nervousness, learning that I set the pace when leading and that walking was comfortable, even free lunging. One thing that took longer to correct was when I saddled him up and started leading him to the arena, he would exhibit that nervous behavior and want to trot off. He corrected well, it just those first few steps. So one day after I untied him, I just stood there rubbing on him and talking to him (mostly in exasperation) about what it was going take to get him to relax and get some trust in me. I must have stood there 4 or 5 minutes doing this before I said 'well, it's time to get to work' and started leading him off. And danged if he didn't walk out calmly like a gentleman. So each and every time I saddle him and before I lead him off, I just sit there rubbing on him and having a conversation, and he continues to move off like a citizen. Whenever I go into his pen, Jake seeks me out for some rubbing. I always have time for that.

I remembered a passage in Tom Dorrance's book "True Horsemanship Through Feel", to the effect about taking your time to greet your horse and rub on him before you put the halter on. So I've made sure to incorporate this as well. To give Jake a rub on the forehead, scratch his withers and talk softly to him before I put his halter on. And while he has been good for awhile about dropping his head and accepting the halter, he now does it in a softer manner.

So this is a long way to get to the point that I do think rubbing and petting and generally showing your horse some affection does do some good. And not just for the human but for the horse as well. I think the horse finds it reassuring. At some level he understands you can give him peace, and it sets the stage for the next thing you ask of him. I think not to take an opportunity to rub on your horse is like hurrying up your wife to get ready for go out for supper,....and that never works out well, now does it.