Friday, October 21, 2011

Cowboy Humor: Montana Rancher versus State Department of Labor

I'm sure everybody has heard about the influx of Californians and other liberals into the Great State of Montana. Not only have they hired a bunch of Democrats for state office and bought up about half the land in the state, these transplanted Montanan's have invaded about every segment of state regulatory agencies as well. In an effort to see if ranch hands could be unionized, the State Department of
Employment, Labor Standards Division sent out several eastern educated young men to collect facts on ranch hands such as their pay and benefits.

One of these young men ventured onto a small ranch and made some not so subtle allegations that a rancher was probably not paying his ranch hands well enough, nor providing for benefits. That conversation went something like this:

State Labor Agent: “I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them.”

Rancher: ”Well, that should be fairly easy seeing how I only have two. There’s my hired hand who’s been with me for 3 years. I pay him $150 a week plus free room and board. Then there’s the mentally challenged guy. He works about 18 hours every day, makes about $10 a week, and does about 90% of all the work around here."

State Labor Agent: "You're kidding?!? Those are terrible wages. That's practically slavery. Do you provide any benefits?"

Rancher: "Well, the hired hand gets to keep three horses which I pay the feed bill for. For the mentally challenged gent, he pays his own room and board, but I buy him a bottle of Wild Turkey every Saturday night so he can cope with life.....oh yeah, he also sleeps with my wife occasionally.”

State Labor Agent: “That’s the guy I want to talk to - the mentally challenged one.”

Rancher: “That would be me.”

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